Now and again I post something about what our little family has been through leading up to the present. In keeping with that, I wanted to share some thoughts I wrote down a little over a year ago.
If I had remembered that I had a journal titled "The Big Moment Book" I would have made an entry on July 19th, 2009. That was the day I decided to buy a pregnancy test. I didn't think I was pregnant, I just wanted to rule it out so that I could road-trip to South Dakota and drink with my aunts, uncles and cousins. Hubby had been teasing me about my being pregnant for weeks due to a late period and a sour tummy. I kept having these cramps, though, and was positive that my period would come soon. So on July 19th I bought a pregnancy test so that I could drink with a clear conscience.
That night we went to Chili's with my in-laws and I had a gloriously large Margarita. After dinner Hubby's parents went to my brother-in-law's house while he and I went home to finish packing. We were to set out on our 1500 mile road trip the next morning. Once I had completed packing, I went to take my test.
I suddenly felt nervous. The digital stick was supposed to flash 'positive' or 'negative' when the analysis completed. There was a strong part of me that wanted it to flash 'positive', but I hadn't prepared for what that would mean. This was not planned. So I peed on the stick, set it aside to analyze and busied myself with other things. I glanced over once and it was still flashing a results pending sign. When I looked again the display was no longer flashing. The stick had processed my urine and now presented its result. It didn't blink or fade, but had settled resolutely on its answer for me. I stared, shocked, at the bold 'positive' spanning the display. I was pregnant.
I opened the bathroom door and took in Hubby's figure, back turned to me, methodically packing a bag. He didn't even know I had purchased the test. I just started talking. In a shy, rushed, and mildly panicked tone, I said, "So, I bought a pregnancy test today and I just took it..." at this point he stopped packing and turned around to face me with the best deer in the headlights impression I've ever seen, "...and it says I'm pregnant." There was only a moment before he broke out in a huge smile and came to hug me. He was so happy, and I was so happy and relieved that he was happy.
We didn't think I could be that far along, but we wanted so badly to tell our parents. I called mine right away and we told Hubby's folks as soon as they returned. So apparently this is how we do things: we got engaged on a whim, married on a weeks notice, and conceived a child with no prior planning. Go us.
So that brings me to today (October 23rd, 2009). For the last couple of weeks I have been feeling flutters and nudges and my belly has become noticeable. I am now 20 weeks and 1 day along (further than we thought) and we had the immense pleasure of watching our son make chewing movements and roll lazily in my womb. Today was a big day, even bigger than when I first heard his little heart beat so fast on my first visit to the OB. There is no sound better, though, than the sound of his heart. I could listen to that all day. I love this little stranger, and I can't wait until the day I get to hold him in my arms.
Wow. Look how far we've come!
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